Two years ago, at age 18, I was dating a man who was physically and psychologically abusive. I became pregnant. My decision to terminate the pregnancy was a difficult one, but ultimately I made my choice. I live in Virginia, where it’s mandatory to receive a certain number of hours of counselling prior to the procedure. When we went to Planned Parenthood to see how far along I was, it was apparent that in the time it would take to receive that counselling I would not be able to have a medical abortion, which was the least invasive option. Knowing this, my mom (pro-choice, thankfully) and I made our way to D.C. Upon arriving to PP, we were harassed and berated by some (not all) anti-choice nuts. A few were very respectfully protesting. Others were downright violent. Calling me a slut, saying I’m going to burn in hell, stuff like that. After all was said and done, one man followed my mother and I to our car and started beating on the windshield.
Through all of this, I was suffering from an addiction to self harm, being treated for bipolar disorder, and was being physically and psychologically abused by the man who got me pregnant. I was living out of a family friend’s pool house and feeding myself with food stamps (no income at all). All that said, there was no way in hell I was even close to being able to care for a child.
… I realized that I’d never get to experience being a child again, and do it like other people got to. I’d never be that 12 year old who is carefree and enjoying and discovering the world …
I know this does not quite touch on what you were expressing in that post, but all the same:
Touch nature, sing with birds, just stare at the sky.
We can be that child again and again if we dare to drop ourselves into the ocean of the world. This is true no matter what trauma and maturity we have suffered.
I mean more the… discovery. I never get to have the naivety in that discovery, discovering things for the first time in that way, never get to be in the 6th grade and well… be that girl. I won’t be a part of the group of 13 year olds on the train laughing, or anything like that. Childhood in that sort of way is not something you can re-live.
The emotional childhood, the child within… yes that one you can get in touch with, but you can never be the child again, the one that crawls up in bed with mom, gets help with homework, and get protected and helped through pretty much everything.
When I turned 18 I mourned the childhood I didn’t get. At that point I realized that I’d never get to experience being a child again, and do it like other people got to. I’d never be that 12 year old who is carefree and enjoying and discovering the world. Which is why I vowed myself to cherish my young adult years and not grow up so fast again. This is why I could never become a mother this early in life, because it would ruin me. I would live life with regret, feeling that I never got to experience life as I should.
Maybe that’s selfish, but I haven’t got to be selfish for most of my life. If you tell me that I’m wrong for putting myself first, and knowing that I I would have an abortion if I became pregnant, okay. Because that is what I’m aiming for. Being selfless all the time will ruin you, I know because I’ve been there, and when you can’t be selfless anymore you drive yourself insane with guilt.
I have to listen to my heart, for once in my life. My heart isn’t ready to let go of my youth. I have a lot I want to do before I want to start a family. I’m going to travel, I’m going to study, I am going to stay up all night with friends, go out and party when I want to, I’ll get tattoos, and I will be free. Then when I’m ready I will be a mom, and I will be so many experiences richer, I will be able to be there for my child.
If I became pregnant now I’d want an abortion, because I didn’t get a childhood, and I grieve that a lot. I want to be a young adult. And when I become a mom I want to be able to give my child their childhood, complete and secure, a childhood I didn’t get.
And that’s okay.
Can we please just talk about how amazing Yollada Suanyot is?
-She was elected to represent Mueang Nan District on the Provincial Administration Organization of Nan Province in Thailand.
-She graduated with a science degree from Thammasat University when she was 21.
-She holds a master’s degree in political science.
-She is currently working toward a Ph.D. in social science.
But that’s not all.
-She’s been a model.
-She’s been a beauty queen.
-She’s been a pop group.
Oh, and she’s transgender.
That badass lady right there has done all of the above whilst not even being recognised as an actual female but has kept going regardless.
-She also founded and chairs the TransFemale Association of Thailand, which advocates for transgender rights.
-She’s raised a ton of money to pay for transgender operations and has helped so many trans people make their full transition.
Did I mention she owns and manages an entire jewellery line?
So to recap…
-She’s an entrepreneur.
-She’s a beauty queen.
-She’s a model.
-She’s a singer.
-She’s a politician.
-She’s an adovcate for transgender rights.
-She’s got a load of degrees under her belt.
She’s just 30 years old.
I don’t know about you guys but she’s literally a hero to me.
So here’s to Yollada Suanyot for being an awesome and empowering young lady!
I came looking at pro-life and pro-choice with no bias as I had no idea which "side" I was on with the matter. However, a pro-life argument that bothered me and turned me away was the "innocence once" because it implied an "innocent" life was more important and had more value than someone who isn't "innocent." do, is a non-virgin less important than a virgin? Is she less deserving? It shows that they place more value on a fetus and it's so wrong.
That’s something I have a big issue with, too. It really reveals what they think about everyone else as they put “innocence” above all. And if we’re being philosophical, can you really be innocent when you are unable to do something that makes you not innocent? If anyone understands what I mean about that.
If you place someone’s worth on inncence that is horrible. And if you think that just because someone’s innocent they can do what they want, that’s also horrible.
OMG you guys IT’s UP!!
as promised, here is the ESC interval act. Also, shamelessly plugging Sweden, this is so accurate description of Sweden (especially the train part)
Not only did Finland get their kiss at the end
in the interval there was a gay couple getting married (acting), with a kiss. I will upload the video on here as soon as it’s on youtube :D
Hahaha that girl is so bitter honestly why does she care who sleeps with who? I am at university and sleep with a lot of people, both men and women, and i love it. I love sex. Im safe, it's cool. I also get good grades, have a job, i am polite and respectable. Why does how much action my vagina sees matter at all?
People really need to learn to mind their own at that sex has NOTHING to do with how good or bad a person is (unless you have sex with someone against their will/consent/lack of consent)